Wisdom and its fruit

Wisdom and discernment are crucial in the formation of a man of God. Combine those words and you get prudent.

In many marriages and homes there is a small stream running underneath the proverbial highway of happiness. This stream is causing unseen erosion that will one day result in a full-on collapse. What is this stream? It is the steady flow of husbands disregarding the input and wisdom of their wives and charging ahead bullishly. The reason why this is so dangerous is because God has designed homes to work in such a way that the man and woman work together in harmony, the man leading with the wisdom and input of the wife. If this is abandoned for the sake of ego or pride, it will have disastrous effects on your household. For one, it will destroy your wife. Eve was given to Adam as a cherished helper, not a silent slave. Adam was to lead his wife as she helped him tend to the world. He wasn’t commanded to lead harshly with no regard for her. The two sides of the coin of ruining your relationship with your wife are ignoring her input and abdicating your role as the leader. One is putting your wife down to a position that she is above, and the other is exalting her to a position that she is not given.

Another effect of this disregard of lady wisdom is your children developing a cancerous lack of respect for their mother. If they see you not holding her opinion highly, they will eventually do the same thing. This type of attitude is caught just as much as it is taught, so the man of God must be on the lookout for every opportunity to esteem his wife highly and include her in the family decision making. This will paint a positive and biblical picture of how the wife and mother should be cared for and listened to.

A clear and present danger in reading this book is going to be a right recognition of the things you are doing wrong and a wrong application of the truth. What you end up with is a bunch of men who know it is wrong to be passive and weak in the home, but who attempt to be good leaders through strong-arming, browbeating, and general dismissal of any input the wife may have. This is a major pitfall that this idea of prudence addresses perfectly. The prudent man recognizes the assets and tools at his disposal and wisely applies them in any given situation. That may mean a choice word in a difficult conversation, a gentle correction for a friend in sin, or the wisdom of a wife in a financial decision. The responsibility falls squarely with the man, but it is up to that man to be prudent in how he behaves in life.

One of the primary ways a wife helps her husband is by being a voice of wisdom and reason. Oftentimes men are clouded by drive and pragmatism, and the role of the wife is to step in and be that lady wisdom who brings the perspective of a godly woman to the situation. A man is not prudent when he habitually disregards this and is, consequently, not being a man of God. For the man of God, a wife is “far more precious than jewels” (Proverbs 31:10). He knows that if he has found a wife he has found “a good thing” (Proverbs 18:22). The prudent man of God is someone who sees the bountiful blessings of God in his life, uses them wisely, and stewards well those gifts in such a way that his family is edified and God is glorified.